Well This Is Just Awesome
Description
Queer, foodie, feminist, engineering student, spends too much time on the internet.Links
So here is the low down.
Health took a bit of a nosedive this weekend. Perfect timing as per usual.
What it turns out to have happened: I got a gut adhesion, happened because of the surgery I had back in September 2011. My intestines are all like YOU SHALL NOT PASS.
What I got diagnosed with before that: “it’s food poisoning, here have some strong painkillers”, “it’s gall stones, here have some anti-biotics and anti-emetics”, “it’s appendicitis, have fun with that”.
I realised I had to go into hospital after I started to throw up water and pills. The past couple of days went past in a blur of morphine and feeling crap and I had an NG tube fitted. Here is my finest elephant impression:
Just saying, having an NG tube inserted whilst conscious - 0/10 would not endure again.
So things are beginning to look up and hopefully I won’t have to have another laparoscopy to fix this. Got my exams in 2 weeks so I’m really quite worried about that but just gonna try and push through I guess. Damn it body you have rubbish timing!
I TOTALLY FORGOT TO MENTION
TODAY (I’ll pretend it’s not actually 2am and I am in the USA or something where today is still yesterday), marks my second cancerversary.
That’s two years since I got diagnosed. I’m still here, that’s pretty awesome right?
I’m writing this on behalf of Jenni, for all of her lovely followers.
I don’t like being the bearer of bad news, but I knew you would all want to know how Jenni’s doing.
On Saturday morning, our darling Jenni passed away peacefully at home. She wasn’t in any pain and it happened very quickly. The night before she had a contented sleep, so she could not have been much happier.
-If anyone wants any more details, or information on her funeral, they can feel free to contact me- my page is forever-a-hufflepuff.
This post hit home hard for me. Jenni had the same cancer as I had, and reached out to me just at the start of her treatment and just at the end of mine. I hope that the little support I had to give took the slightest edge off some of the harshest moments for her, and I am glad that she passed away peacefully.
Seriously, fuck cancer.
On the subject of being tired.
Being tired is freaking scary for me.
It’s been a while since my last hospital check up (my next one is on Thursday)
My brain is full of what ifs
My stomach is slightly bloated, what if there’s another tumour.
Why is there a random sore spot on my ribcage.
Why am I falling asleep in the middle of the afternoon.
Why were my lifts suffering.
Why is it getting harder to bike up hills.
In the end…I’m almost positive it’s nothing. I’ve been working long shifts, it’s near the end of a long term, I’ve been eating mostly at a caloric deficit and I’m just paranoid.
Still means I can’t wait to get a blood test and a scan. I need reassurance.
I got a load of compliments about my hair the other day.
From girls on my course. And I realised it’s because they’ve never seen me with straight hair, I had chemo curls right until the end of summer exams. That’s weird to know.
Meanwhile my housemate’s new name for me is Beiber.
This may be a silly idea but it’s worth a go…I have 4 chemo caps that I don’t need any more that someone out there in the Tumblrverse might like. Anyone in the UK is welcome to have any or all of them and I will be happy to post them to you for free.
There is:
- One plain grey, and one red and white hat/scarf, made of soft cotton and infused with aloe vera.
- One chemo cap (from the one and only chemocapmaker who is a fabulous person) which is reversible with tiny flowers on one side and a bright rainbow stripe on the other.
- One PIRATE SCARF. It’s a pre tied bandana with skulls and roses.
- Also 3 scarves I bought to go with the hats so you can mix and match
Spread this around if you know any of your followers who might be interested, PM me if you would like any of these things but I only have a couple of days until I go back to uni so contact me ASAP and by Friday morning at the latest.
Jesus. Rollerblading. Christ. Booking hospital appointments is a pain in the ass.
So I was given my clean bill of health, and two scans to book at 3 months and 6 months time. They want me to have ultrasounds and MRIs instead of CT and PETs because I’m looking increasingly less likely to relapse and they want to try to limit the amount of radiation I get. So far so good. Book the scan in the morning, consultation in the afternoon, no fuss no muss! So I go to Outpatients and book in for Monday 17th December for the first consultation and then off I skip to my TMI-warning-trans-vaginal-ultrasound (I affectionately term that one the “dildo scan”).
See what I mean. Anyway.
Turns out you can’t have your dildo scanned on a Monday. The only day I can have an outpatient consultation is a Monday, and I can’t get the scan on a Monday so that means *drumroll*…I get to make an extra 4 hour round trip to go to two half-hour appointments a week apart from each other. Excellent. Not only that but I have to miss the last day of term so I can go get probed ahead of the consultation I had booked. Although admittedly that isn’t too much of a big deal because 80% of the class will have inevitably gone home a day early anyway. My excuse is a valid one.
So, that arranged, I then go off to MRI where it turns out I have to have a few days between my MRI scan and a consultation anyway so YAY MORE 2 HOUR CAR JOURNEYS. This is without even factoring in me coming down from Nottingham to attend most of these appointments.
In short everything is a lot more effort than it needs to be.
I don’t wanna do my homework!!! I just wanna take a nap. I have no idea why I thought doing college and chemo at the same time would be a good idea.
Oh god I’ve got to do uni work while on chemo this year. If the summer was any indication, this is going to be… interesting.
I can’t get over how ridiculously hardcore you are.
I just had to throw coffee down the sink
Because it had milk in it and I can’t have milk this morning. Baaaaw CT scans suck.
Little Things
Today I bought hairties.
Take that cancer.
I choose to celebrate the little things.
My fringe is starting to get in my eyes. YAAAAAY HAIR.
(via carolinathrowmealighter)
cohenstr
Things that happen in this video:
I make a speech.
I dance.
You see just how much run/walking 4K and then running 1K destroys me.
This is quality entertainment at it’s finest!
The speech is heavily edited in the video because a) Some bits were drowned out by noise, b) I blathered on for something like 4 minutes c) Most of that time I was going “ERRRRRRR…UHHHRM…”
I was super clever and didn’t bring any notes or prompts with me so it’s a miracle that anything came out of my mouth at all.
Here is the speech in full:
“If someone had told me a couple of years ago that I’d be standing in front of a crowd at Race for Life, talking about cancer, I wouldn’t have believed them for a second. I’m definitely not known for my public speaking skills so I’d have probably questioned why anyone thought it was a good idea to let me on the stage in the first place!
I’ll tell you the reason why I’m on this stage. One year and three months ago, on a beautiful spring day, I was sat in a doctor’s office and heard the words “ovarian cancer”. Stage IV ovarian dysgerminoma. It felt like the floor had fallen away from beneath my feet. There was one bit of hope– the prognosis wasn’t bad. It would be hard going but there was light at the end of the tunnel.
I went from being a fresher at uni, living in halls and away from home for the first time in my life, to a cancer patient. There was virtually no time to adjust to this strange and unfamiliar place I found myself in. My friends and family rallied around me and it was their love and support that helped me keep smiling. Whether it was picnics in between rounds of chemo right here on the Heath or poker games held from my hospital bed. We even celebrated my Dad’s 60th birthday in the hospital car park so I could be there. My friends and family are amazing and I love them all!
I wouldn’t be standing here today if it weren’t for the 2 surgeries and 4 rounds of chemotherapy I went through over the past year. I’m now in remission, I’m a survivor and that’s all thanks to the work done by Cancer Research UK. 40 years ago the treatment for my cancer didn’t even exist, but today it can be cured. New ways to prevent, diagnose and treat all cancers are being discovered all the time, and it’s helping millions of people have more time to spend with the people they love.
A couple of weeks ago I took a break from my exams to come home and surprise my dad at his 61st birthday. We were sat round the table when it dawned on us just how different things were from a year ago. I mean for a start we weren’t eating in a car park. We made a toast to that difference. YOU are making that difference by being here today and I want to say a massive thank you to each and every one of you. Today it is us versus cancer, BRING IT ON!”
FunnyJunk is threatening to file a federal lawsuit against me unless I pay $20,000 in damages. Details here.
